


When the Slipper Doesn't Fit

by coolconnor95



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Drama, Family, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-25
Updated: 2019-06-25
Packaged: 2020-05-21 00:32:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19362736
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coolconnor95/pseuds/coolconnor95
Summary: Alex Herman has grown up hearing that princesses could do anything. But what if being a princess doesn't feel right? The glass slipper could never fit. Growing up in a world lost in a time of it's own, what hope is there when you feel so different and you're questioning who you are? Is there anyone you can trust? (Warning for talk of needles, periods, and some mild cussing (ass). Written for Variety in OUAT forum's June 2019 month on fanfiction.net. oneshot.)





	When the Slipper Doesn't Fit

Alex stood in the back of the pharmacy, staring at chocolate bars. He knew he shouldn't be waiting here this long. He should have been in and out, grabbing the sanitary items he needed, and yet, he couldn't bring himself to buy the pads or tampons. If his mother wasn't working at the daycare, he would have asked her. But she was too busy. He could have even asked his dad and dealt with the loving, but painful, jokes about how awkward it was for a man to buy sanitary items intended for women, but his father had work as well. So here he was instead, unable to bring himself to enter that aisle even though he needed to.

Perhaps he should have told someone by now. He'd known since puberty hit that things weren't right. He'd stared into the mirror enough times, looking at the way his chest had grown, to know that his body didn't feel right at all. He wasn't a girl, even if he had a girl's body. But how did you tell that to a father who constantly called you his little princess? How did you tell that to a mother who waited and relished "girl's night?" How did you tell that to a town that seemed constantly stuck in the eighties?

Alex didn't know. All he knew was the stories he found on the internet. Other transgender people talked about their families not accepting them for who they were. What would that be like in a small town like this? His parents had always been loving and kind toward him, but what if having a son instead of a daughter was enough to change that? Alex didn't want to find out what could happen if that was the case.

So instead he stood in the candy aisle of Dark Star Pharmacy, just trying to work up the nerve to do what he needed to. He didn't want to feel dysphoric, especially at the cash register. But with no one else to do this for him, he would just have to face the discomfort.

Alex looked over the selection of candy bars, throwing an Apollo bar into his basket to try and brace himself for what was to come. He attempted to go into the correct aisle, but found he wasn't quite ready, so instead he went into the closest aisle. He was one aisle closer, but still not close enough …

And he hated this aisle as well. It was filled with magazines and comic books. Characters like the Hulk and Thor looked back at him with their huge muscles, making him feel so small and girly. He pulled on his oversized grey sweater, trying to make it serve its purpose to hide his body. He was athletic, sure, but girly athletic, as Black Widow seemed to remind him. He didn't want to think about the way her boobs were accentuated. Were his boobs that noticeable? Not with the sweater … but his hips were harder to hide. He needed to get baggier jeans.

Alex pulled down on the sweater, trying to hide his body further, but to cover his hips, he had to pull it tight enough that his boobs were easily visible. Alex let out a very quiet sigh.

Things had been easier before puberty. He hadn't even known he was a boy! His parents had always let him wear what he wanted to, and they still did. He'd grown up hearing stories about Snow White learning how to shoot a bow and leading a resistance. He'd grown up hearing most of the townsfolk saying that girls could do whatever they wanted. His parents had encouraged his love of the outdoors and other interests, and he had felt so free. He'd heard about how his mother had been able to find happiness with the help of a shoe, and he'd dreamt of similar.

But then his chest had started to grow, and his body had changed, and he felt trapped. Sure, a girl could do anything, and the town would accept them, but could a boy exist inside a girl's body? What would the town thing of that? He wasn't sure, but he did know that no shoe seemed to fit him now. Alex had this body for a few years now. He was fifteen … and every day he had wanted to tell his parents, tell someone. It hurt to be trapped as something you didn't want to be. They'd fully accepted every interest he had as a girl, but would it be the same if they knew he'd never been a girl at all?

His dysphoria was bad today. Some days these magazines didn't torture him so. Some days he could appreciate muscular men, but not today. Deciding he didn't want to torture himself any longer, Alex braced himself to head into that dreaded aisle to get what he needed. However, just as he was about to leave the magazine aisle, he heard the jingle of the bell as the door to the pharmacy opened. It caused him to pause and listen in. Any small distraction from his intended purpose was very welcome.

"It's real quiet in here today Tom," someone commented rather loudly. "Anyone here?"

"No, just you," the dwarf responded. Alex must have been here so long that Mr. Clark forgot anyone else was present. Alex didn't know if he liked that invisible feeling, but at least it gave him a chance to eavesdrop. He peeked around the corner, recognizing that Mr. Clark was talking to one of his brothers. Alex never could keep them straight. He didn't see the dwarves that much, and some of them were quiet and hardly seen around town. Was this one Sleepy? Happy? Bashful? He wasn't sure.

"Thank goodness. I hate all those side eyes when I have to get more needles," the brother muttered, and Alex's interest increased. He was here to get needles? From the pharmacy? Then, he must have some sort of medical condition that required him to inject something into his body, but what? Maybe Alex could figure out more. It was much better than thinking on the painful cramps or dysphoria anyway.

"Before I forget Aiden, you gotta come by the club later. I'm not letting you buy your testosterone til you promise! I'm the only one who's been going lately and I'm the only one that's completely straight! They keep asking me why I'm not bringing you guys with me!"

Testosterone? Alex's breath caught in his throat. The dwarf was buying male hormones? He got injections of testosterone? Why? As far as he knew, the only married dwarf was Leroy. Why would Aiden need it? It wasn't for fertility then … could it be for something else? Could he be trans too? How likely was that, realistically? Not very …

"Fine, fine, I'll come. You know I've been busy," Aiden grumbled good naturedly. "But I'll come. Just so long as they stop trying to get me to do drag. I'm trans for goodness sakes. I don't want to pretend to be a woman, no thank you."

"You're trans?" The question slipped out of Alex's mouth before he could stop it. He'd been trying to spy, but he was in shock.

Both brothers jumped. Mr. Clark sneezed violently as the other dwarf eyed Alex with a lot of suspicion and nervousness in his eyes.

"Alexandra! I'm sorry I forgot you were here." Mr. Clark glanced at his brother apologetically, but soon his eyes were back on Alex.

Alex had winced when he was called Alexandra, and while Mr. Clark hadn't noticed, Aiden seemed to. The dwarf had relaxed considerably, and he motioned for Alex to come closer.

"Yeah, I'm trans," Aiden answered, still studying Alex with his eyes. It wasn't an unkind or stern gaze, and yet it still made Alex feel a bit uncomfortable. "Are you interested in learning more about that?"

Alex nodded, slowly walking toward the two men. He started playing with the sleeves of the oversized, grey sweater. Sometimes it was good for more than just trying to hide his body from himself and the world.

It was still hard to believe the man in front of him was trans. He had stubble. He looked so distinctly male. Would Alex be able to look like that if he took enough testosterone? If only he could.

"What exactly do you want to know?" Aiden asked, his eyes fixed on Alex still.

Mr. Clark looked back and forth between them, sneezing again. Other than that sound, Alex didn't notice anything but the dwarf before him.

Alex took a deep breath. He could ask just about anything now and Aiden was offering to answer for him. He had to try … "How … do people react? Do people really respect you for who you are?"

Mr. Clark sneezed again. He was bristling. He hadn't noticed the same signs that Aiden had, and he seemed rather angry. "Of course we do! Why wouldn't we accept him?!"

Aiden practically ignored him, keeping his focus on Alex. "Well, my brothers accept me. Not everyone does, or well. Most people don't know. I can pass and I like to. It helps keep me from feeling shy when people just think I'm a man. But, well, the people that do know and accept me? They're the people I know I can rely on."

Alex nodded, and he could feel Mr. Clarks gaze softening. It seemed like he was catching on to what Aiden suspected now. "How did you, uh, decide? To tell your brothers?"

"I … didn't." His look changed and it was somewhat sad and pained. "I didn't really have a choice in the matter. I think Geoffrey is the only one I actually told … Dopey," he added with a grin when he noticed Alex's confused expression. "Can you tell us apart?" Aiden asked with a bit of mischief in his voice.

"Um, some of you," Alex admitted, his face turning red. "Of course I know Mr. Clark is Sneezy. I see Doc at the hospital. And everyone knows Leroy."

Mr. Clark chuckled, and then sneezed again. "Indeed, everyone knows him."

"I just don't get the chance to see the rest of you that often," Alex admitted honestly.

"Then let me introduce myself," Aiden insisted, smiling slightly. "I'm Bashful, or Aiden. I prefer he/him pronouns. And … what about you?"

Alex felt his heart drop as Aiden used pronouns to introduce himself. He was giving Alex the chance to say not just his name, but his pronouns. He was giving Alex the chance to identify his pronouns. "I'm Alex … I'm a guy but I'm still in the closet. Don't tell anyone?"

"Wouldn't dream of it," Aiden insisted, and Mr. Clark nodded along with him. "It's nice to meet you Alex."

Alex nodded again. His emotions were starting to overwhelm him. Apparently, parts of the town were more accepting than he could possibly dream.

He paused to wipe a tear from his eyes, only to look up and see Mr. Clark offering him a tissue. "Always keep a bunch on me since I'm always sneezing," he informed Alex.

Alex took it, wiping his eyes and then looking back to Aiden. "So, you didn't … you didn't tell anyone then."

"Well, not my brothers no. You're looking for some advice, aren't you?"

Aiden nodded again. "How, um, how should I tell my parents? What if they … react poorly?"

Aiden's brow furrowed as he thought. "Hmm. Well you can't really control how they react. Who are your parents?"

"Ashley and Sean," Mr. Clark answered for him.

"Oh. Well I think it's unlikely their reaction would be too horrible. But anything can happen. I'd suggest just, making sure you're ready for it. And if they don't accept you, well, here." He reached into his pocket, pulling out a card and handing it to Alex. "That's my phone number. If they take it bad just come talk to me. I'll help you out."

"We all will," Mr. Clark insisted, and Aiden sighed heavily.

"Of course you all will, but I'm the only one who's actually trans."

"So what? That means we aren't good enough support for him now?" The casual use of the word him made Alex's heart soar. It felt so good, especially after being called Alexandra only moments before.

"Of course not! Just means he might need my help specifically." Mr. Clark had started to chuckle, revealing he was just trying to get a rise out of Aiden.

Aiden huffed, turning his attention back to Alex. "Don't feel like you have to tell them now. Tell them when you're ready. But if things don't go well, we'll be here to help you Alex."

"Thank you," Alex was grinning and crying all at once. He continued to wipe away the tears, but at least they were good ones and not the painful sobs he'd had recently, of knowing that no one knew he was a man. This was much nicer and sympathetic.

"So uh, young man, what were you looking for? You were here so long I forgot. Can you find it?" Mr. Clark questioned.

It felt so nice to be called a young man, and yet it came with having to explain his dreaded purpose. "Oh, yeah uh … I need pads. I know where they are I just, well …"

Both men looked at him with a pained understanding on their faces. "Right. That sucks," Aiden said, before heading toward the aisle. "I'll grab them for you."

"Did you need anything else?" Mr. Clark asked as Aiden disappeared around the corner.

"Um, I got a chocolate bar. We already have pain killers at home, so I don't need that." Alex picked up the Apollo bar from his basket, placing it on the counter. Mr. Clark scanned it, and soon Aiden had returned with a box of sanitary items.

Mr. Clark scanned it and put it in a plastic bag so quickly that Alex barely had a chance to glance at it. "Thank you. Both of you."

"Any time," Aiden stated as Alex pulled out his card to pay. Mr. Clark accepted the payment, and soon the transaction was complete.

"I really do appreciate it." There wasn't a reason to hang around still, and yet, Alex didn't want to leave yet. There was another trans man in Storybrooke! He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay with Aiden and Mr. Clark forever. He felt accepted by them, and how did he know for sure if his parents would feel the same way?

"Text me anytime, alright? Any time you need me, I'd love to help," Aiden insisted, as if reading his mind. No matter what happened, at least a few people supported him. It would be fine …

"You, you said all your brothers accept you? Dr. Ein is my doctor. So, I could tell him?"

Aiden nodded. "Yeah. He wouldn't tell anyone anyway; because of doctor patient confidentiality. He'd be a great person to practice telling, if you wanted to. Arthur's the first one who found out about me and he never told anyone. He's great."

"Okay. Thanks." Surely Alex could find more to talk about … but then bell above the door dinged again.

A small woman limped in. She looked very pale and sickly, and she was already looking at Mr. Clark. "You got my meds Clark! Hope you do. I don't want to have to drag my ass back here cause the hospital messed up again."

Alex stared at her for a moment with quiet surprise. He had to wonder how such a loud voice could come from such a small and sickly woman … but she glanced at him and he looked away rather quickly, his face heating up.

Aiden caught her attention then, to Alex's relief. "He was just about to ring me up Cherise," Aiden said with a fake whine, as he stepped away from the cash register once again. "But you can go first. Don't think your husband would be too happy if I let you pass out in the pharmacy."

Alex was already slipping out the door as he heard her start to protest. "You really think I'm about to pass out Aiden? Maybe I am …"

Alex glanced one last time at the dwarf. Aiden offered him one last encouraging grin, and then Alex had slipped out the door.

He walked over to his bike, grabbing it and starting to ride home. Despite it being the afternoon, roads were rather quiet, as always. It was a small town after all, and the quietness gave Alex a chance to think. He wasn't the only trans man here, and more importantly, he'd have a support system to fall back on if telling his parents backfired. When he was ready, he should be able to tell them. When he was ready … but now that he had to actually come up with a plan Alex felt an even bigger sense of dread. How would they respond? Sure, Aiden would help … but Alex didn't want to lose his parents over this. What if he did?

Despite the positive encounter, fear started to gnaw at his stomach, joining the pain of his period cramps. He forced it away by reminding himself that he didn't have to tell them just yet. He could wait until he was ready … he would wait until he was ready. He had support now. He had time. There was no need to rush. Alex would come out when he was ready, and he'd be prepared for anything that might happen.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed. This was written for the Variety in OUAT forum's June 2019 month on fanfiction.net. This month our focus is on LGBTQ+ identities, hence the story about Alex being trans. I had thought it would be interesting if Alex was trans for a while, since Ashley seems to dress him more as a boy when he's young in a daycare episode. I hope you guys enjoy this take!
> 
> Want more reading? If you loved Cherise here, you should go check out Tu Me Manques by Wishful Dwarfing, which is only on fanfiction.net. Cherise belongs to Wishful Dwarfing and her story over there is incredible if you're interested. And, if you liked seeing trans Bashful, you should go check out my other work, What Bossy Doesn't Know. There you get a glimpse at Bashful's life being trans in the Enchanted Forest. If either of those sound appealing, go check them out!


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